Sex sells 5

It never ends…

Bellies and UDL.

I wonder what I’d look like without my belly chub. It’s always been there. I’ve always grabbed at it, poked it, squished it around to make the pseudo-butt cleavage. I wonder what I’d look like with an actual toned tummy. Maybe my belly button jewelry will actually sit right, instead of crooked, due to the skewing of my center line due to non-balanced chub. Maybe I could actually CHANGE my belly button jewelry. Cause, you know, that would be cool. Inasmuch as I actually like the starting jewelry, I could change it to something dangly and annoying. What happened to simplicity? Girls are carrying around the dangling-to-the-shoulder earrings, dangling rings, dangling bracelets, layered necklaces, why not add dangling other body jewelry to that list. You’ve gotta be hauling around at least another pound or two of metal that way. Sheesh.

Ew. Is it really that hard for people to clean up after they pee? I always check the seat out for UDL (Unidentified Drops of Liquid) before I pee, because that’s really gross, plopping your rear end down on the seat, and feeling that cold wetness spread out over one leg/cheek or the other, and come to the horrid realization that you’ve sat on what is possibly someone else’s liquid excretions… regardless of whether or not it’s water from their hands or just splash residue from the sink — you can never be too careful in an office full of non-family people. Ewie. I’m not as OCD about germs as some other people I know, but geez. Ew to residual pee on toilet seats.

On the subject of religion.

Oh yeah. I totally went there.

sometimes i think religious institutions (church/temple/mosque) are only there to provide structure to those who are too weak to have faith for the sake of faith alone.

Discuss.

Sex sells 4

Everyone’s favorite category is back! How do I know? The blog stats don’t lie. My most visited posts are the ‘Sex sells’ series. In particular, the Suggestive Advertising post. If you don’t know what I’m talking about, move your mouse to the tabs up top and click the one marked ‘Series’.

As an explanation: “Social campaign by the AIDS information center in Frankfurt.”
This is from haha.nu.

Halloween memories.

Sometime in elementary school, I wanted to dress up as a nerve cell for Halloween.

How nerdy was I?

Answer: Extremely.

An evening with Mr. Girth

Coming soon (on Monday, October 30, actually), my much anticipated interview with Mr. Girth. I mean, Dave.

Find out the nitty gritty on this MySpace celeb on Monday morning. You know you want to.

Why?

Do guys always seem to think the girl should automatically know what they’re thinking? Why do they get mad when the girl tries to delve deeper?

Why the hell can’t we communicate effectively with each other?

Miss-communication.

The title was intentionally spelled incorrectly. There was something wrong, I’m a stickler for clear lines of communication, some key point was completely missed. Lost in translation, interpretation, and transportation.

Even college graduates with majors in English and praise for essays and speeches — we still manage to befuddle our peers with our lines of communication.

How do we delineate a friendship? Is it what we get from the other friend? Is it how we use and manipulate the other person to our own social needs? Is it the frequency and quality of your correspondence? Can two people be close friends despite not talking to each other in months or years? Can two people be considered acquaintances even when they talk to each other every day for hours on end? What defines this? What defines our relationships?

Time.

I really should have come up with a more interesting title, but really — if you knew my current state of being, you should be so lucky that you’re getting a post at all.

I’ve decided to share something from one of my favorite bands: dredg.

climbing
building us up
tearing me down
lifted back up we are climbing
all of this time
drifting right back to the ground

suddenly, suddenly, suddenly, suddenly

questioning, and saying
our opinions, they’re failing
they’re constantly changing
our ignorance, remaining
we’re hoping, and waiting
we’re living, but dying
while trying to find out
my meaning isn’t planned out
come to the conclusion
might as well be an illusion
while trying to find out
i did nothing, but shut out

This song is called ‘yatahaze’. No, I don’t know what it mean, but I think the lyrics represent the quarter life crisis really well. Especially the longer 2nd part.

This is actually ‘yatahaze’ and part ‘matroshka’.

Rainy days.

Do seasoned (maybe I’m giving these people too much credit) drivers suddenly forget how to drive when it starts to drizzle?

Seriously, if all current drivers were made to take the road test again, I’m guaranteeing less than half would actually pass.